New years resolutions are hurting future you.

pexels-photo-273011.jpegIt’s a new year, we all know that, especially those of us who have to write the date every day. That calls for new resolutions, right? A new approach to life? A new plan? A new you? Not necessarily. Remember last years resolutions? No, me neither. Which probably means they didn’t get very far, but that doesn’t make you a failure. Do not set yourself up to fail or more importantly, do not set yourself up to feel like a failure.

It’s okay to start the year with no plan, to be honest, it is probably better for you. Starting the year with resolutions like ‘lose 2 stone’ ultimately set you up to fail. Not because you aren’t capable of achieving that goal, but because you are giving yourself the chance to be disappointed if you do not. Rather than have set goals, it would be a better idea to have things that you want to improve on, so rather than lose weight, perhaps just exercise more, or eat more fruit daily. Little changes like that are not only easier to achieve but less likely to make you feel terrible about yourself if you miss one week. One day of eating fruit is better than none, right?

Not only is it a healthier attitude to success, it’s a healthier way of viewing achievement. It is what you DID do, not what you didn’t. You did eat a piece of fruit this week (yay) instead of not losing weight this week. Don’t beat yourself up over something that doesn’t even matter. It’s important to be happy with yourself, but rather than work on an age old concept of beauty, work on yourself.

Make goals that are not long term. Yes, we all like to have goals or things to aim for, but make sure they doable! Starting the year with a goal to cut out chocolate or something else just means you’ve given yourself a long term problem, that’s 365 days that you have to avoid something that you didn’t before. Giving yourself temptations in the process and therefore allowing yourself a concept of ‘failure’ if you do decide to indulge. It’s not that I don’t believe you can do it, but I think we are all a little hard on ourselves when it comes to new years resolutions. If you do want to push yourself and it works for you, go for it! Be the best you that you can be, or whatever the inspirational quote is.

With all the options to slowly change things, you can quite happily not change anything. The new year doesn’t mean anything needs to change bar the numbers in your diary. You are not obliged to change because the date has. Do yourself a favour and be kinder to yourself, do not expect so much from yourself. If you are to change anything this year, change your attitude towards yourself, from negative to positive. We put ourselves through enough in everyday life, physically and mentally, without allowing a made up concept hurt us too. Take those self care Sundays and make it a self care year. Do things to make yourself happy but do not give yourself challenges that set you up to fail.

Maybe 2018 will be the year we stop beating ourselves up about everything and just let ourselves be happy. With all the body positivity movements of 2017 and the people speaking up about mental health, I am confident in our ability to be happy or at least content this year. We need to continue making the world a better place, one smile at a time.


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